pgstrata
What You'll Wish You'd Known
2

January 2005

3

*(I wrote this talk for a high school.

4

I never actually gave it, because the school authorities vetoed the plan to invite me.)*

5

When I said I was speaking at a high school, my friends were curious.

6

What will you say to high school students?

7

So I asked them, what do you wish someone had told you in high school?

8

Their answers were remarkably similar.

9

So I'm going to tell you what we all wish someone had told us.

10

I'll start by telling you something you don't have to know in high school: what you want to do with your life.

11

People are always asking you this, so you think you're supposed to have an answer.

12

But adults ask this mainly as a conversation starter.

13

They want to know what sort of person you are, and this question is just to get you talking.

14

They ask it the way you might poke a hermit crab in a tide pool, to see what it does.

15

If I were back in high school and someone asked about my plans, I'd say that my first priority was to learn what the options were.

16

You don't need to be in a rush to choose your life's work.

17

What you need to do is discover what you like.

18

You have to work on stuff you like if you want to be good at what you do.

19

It might seem that nothing would be easier than deciding what you like, but it turns out to be hard, partly because it's hard to get an accurate picture of most jobs.

20

Being a doctor is not the way it's portrayed on TV.

21

Fortunately you can also watch real doctors, by volunteering in hospitals. [1]

22

But there are other jobs you can't learn about, because no one is doing them yet.

23

Most of the work I've done in the last ten years didn't exist when I was in high school.

24

The world changes fast, and the rate at which it changes is itself speeding up.

25

In such a world it's not a good idea to have fixed plans.

5–9

Asked what they wished someone had told them in high school, my friends gave remarkably similar answers. So I'll tell you what we all wish we'd heard.

10–14

Start with what you don't have to know: what you want to do with your life. Adults ask mainly as a conversation starter — the way you might poke a hermit crab in a tide pool to see what it does.

15–18

My first priority would be to learn the options. You don't need to rush to choose your life's work. You have to work on stuff you like if you want to be good at what you do.

19–25

But deciding what you like is hard, partly because it's hard to picture most jobs — being a doctor isn't the way it's portrayed on TV. And some jobs you can't learn about because no one's doing them yet. The world changes fast, so fixed plans are a bad idea.

2–25

You don't need to know what to do with your life yet; your job is to discover what you like, and in a fast-changing world fixed plans are a mistake.

27

And yet every May, speakers all over the country fire up the Standard Graduation Speech, the theme of which is: don't give up on your dreams. I know what they mean, but this is a bad way to put it, because it implies you're supposed to be bound by some plan you made early on.

28

The computer world has a name for this: premature optimization.

29

And it is synonymous with disaster.

30

These speakers would do better to say simply, don't give up.

31

What they really mean is, don't get demoralized.

32

Don't think that you can't do what other people can.

33

And I agree you shouldn't underestimate your potential.

34

People who've done great things tend to seem as if they were a race apart.

35

And most biographies only exaggerate this illusion, partly due to the worshipful attitude biographers inevitably sink into, and partly because, knowing how the story ends, they can't help streamlining the plot till it seems like the subject's life was a matter of destiny, the mere unfolding of some innate genius.

36

In fact I suspect if you had the sixteen year old Shakespeare or Einstein in school with you, they'd seem impressive, but not totally unlike your other friends.

37

Which is an uncomfortable thought.

38

If they were just like us, then they had to work very hard to do what they did.

39

And that's one reason we like to believe in genius.

40

It gives us an excuse for being lazy.

41

If these guys were able to do what they did only because of some magic Shakespeareness or Einsteinness, then it's not our fault if we can't do something as good.

42

I'm not saying there's no such thing as genius.

43

But if you're trying to choose between two theories and one gives you an excuse for being lazy, the other one is probably right.

44

So far we've cut the Standard Graduation Speech down from "don't give up on your dreams" to "what someone else can do, you can do."

45

But it needs to be cut still further.

46

There is some variation in natural ability.

47

Most people overestimate its role, but it does exist. If I were talking to a guy four feet tall whose ambition was to play in the NBA, I'd feel pretty stupid saying, you can do anything if you really try. [2]

48

We need to cut the Standard Graduation Speech down to, "what someone else with your abilities can do, you can do; and don't underestimate your abilities."

49

But as so often happens, the closer you get to the truth, the messier your sentence gets.

50

We've taken a nice, neat (but wrong) slogan, and churned it up like a mud puddle.

51

It doesn't make a very good speech anymore.

52

But worse still, it doesn't tell you what to do anymore.

53

Someone with your abilities?

54

What are your abilities?

27–30

Every May, speakers fire up the Standard Graduation Speech: don't give up on your dreams. But that implies you're bound by some early plan — what the computer world calls premature optimization, synonymous with disaster. Better to say simply: don't give up.

31–36

What they mean is don't get demoralized. People who've done great things seem a race apart, and biographies exaggerate it, streamlining a life till it seems like destiny. But the sixteen-year-old Shakespeare or Einstein would seem impressive, not totally unlike your friends.

37–43

Which is uncomfortable. If they were just like us, they had to work very hard. That's why we like to believe in genius: it excuses our laziness. But if you're choosing between two theories and one gives you an excuse for being lazy, the other one is probably right.

44–54

So we've cut the speech to "what someone else can do, you can do." Cut it further: there is some variation in natural ability — you can't tell a guy four feet tall he'll play in the NBA. So: "what someone with your abilities can do, you can do." But the closer you get to the truth, the messier the sentence — and worse, it no longer tells you what to do. What are your abilities?

27–54

The "don't give up on your dreams" speech wrongly assumes a fixed plan; cut down to its honest core it becomes "what someone with your abilities can do, you can do" — which no longer tells you what to do.

56

Upwind

57

I think the solution is to work in the other direction.

58

Instead of working back from a goal, work forward from promising situations.

59

This is what most successful people actually do anyway.

60

In the graduation-speech approach, you decide where you want to be in twenty years, and then ask: what should I do now to get there?

61

I propose instead that you don't commit to anything in the future, but just look at the options available now, and choose those that will give you the most promising range of options afterward.

62

It's not so important what you work on, so long as you're not wasting your time.

63

Work on things that interest you and increase your options, and worry later about which you'll take.

64

Suppose you're a college freshman deciding whether to major in math or economics.

65

Well, math will give you more options: you can go into almost any field from math.

66

If you major in math it will be easy to get into grad school in economics, but if you major in economics it will be hard to get into grad school in math.

67

Flying a glider is a good metaphor here.

68

Because a glider doesn't have an engine, you can't fly into the wind without losing a lot of altitude.

69

If you let yourself get far downwind of good places to land, your options narrow uncomfortably.

70

As a rule you want to stay upwind.

71

So I propose that as a replacement for "don't give up on your dreams." Stay upwind.

72

How do you do that, though?

73

Even if math is upwind of economics, how are you supposed to know that as a high school student?

74

Well, you don't, and that's what you need to find out.

75

Look for smart people and hard problems. Smart people tend to clump together, and if you can find such a clump, it's probably worthwhile to join it.

76

But it's not straightforward to find these, because there is a lot of faking going on.

77

To a newly arrived undergraduate, all university departments look much the same.

78

The professors all seem forbiddingly intellectual and publish papers unintelligible to outsiders.

79

But while in some fields the papers are unintelligible because they're full of hard ideas, in others they're deliberately written in an obscure way to seem as if they're saying something important.

80

This may seem a scandalous proposition, but it has been experimentally verified, in the famous Social Text affair.

81

Suspecting that the papers published by literary theorists were often just intellectual-sounding nonsense, a physicist deliberately wrote a paper full of intellectual-sounding nonsense, and submitted it to a literary theory journal, which published it.

82

The best protection is always to be working on hard problems. Writing novels is hard.

83

Reading novels isn't.

84

Hard means worry: if you're not worrying that something you're making will come out badly, or that you won't be able to understand something you're studying, then it isn't hard enough.

85

There has to be suspense.

86

Well, this seems a grim view of the world, you may think.

87

What I'm telling you is that you should worry?

88

Yes, but it's not as bad as it sounds.

89

It's exhilarating to overcome worries.

90

You don't see faces much happier than people winning gold medals.

91

And you know why they're so happy?

92

Relief.

93

I'm not saying this is the only way to be happy.

94

Just that some kinds of worry are not as bad as they sound.

57–63

The solution is to work the other way: instead of working back from a goal, work forward from promising situations, as most successful people do anyway. Don't commit to anything; just choose the options now that give you the most promising range afterward, and worry later about which you'll take.

64–66

Math versus economics? Math gives more options: from math it's easy to get into grad school in economics, but not the other way around.

67–71

Flying a glider is a good metaphor. With no engine, you can't fly into the wind without losing altitude, and if you drift far downwind of good landing spots, your options narrow. So, replacing "don't give up on your dreams": stay upwind.

72–76

But how do you know what's upwind? You don't — that's what you need to find out. Look for smart people and hard problems. Smart people clump together, and joining a clump is worthwhile. But it's not straightforward, because there's a lot of faking going on.

77–81

In some fields papers are hard because they're full of hard ideas; in others they're deliberately obscure to seem important. This was verified in the Social Text affair, when a physicist got a paper of intellectual-sounding nonsense published in a literary journal.

82–85

The best protection is always to work on hard problems. Writing novels is hard; reading them isn't. If you're not worried that what you're making will come out badly, it isn't hard enough. There has to be suspense.

86–92

A grim view, you think — I'm telling you to worry? Yes, but it's exhilarating to overcome worries. You don't see faces happier than people winning gold medals. And you know why they're so happy? Relief.

56–94

Instead of working back from a goal, work forward from promising situations: keep your options open and stay upwind. Find smart people and hard problems, and accept that hard work means worry.

96

Ambition

97

In practice, "stay upwind" reduces to "work on hard problems." And you can start today.

98

I wish I'd grasped that in high school.

99

Most people like to be good at what they do.

100

In the so-called real world this need is a powerful force.

101

But high school students rarely benefit from it, because they're given a fake thing to do.

102

When I was in high school, I let myself believe that my job was to be a high school student.

103

And so I let my need to be good at what I did be satisfied by merely doing well in school.

104

If you'd asked me in high school what the difference was between high school kids and adults, I'd have said it was that adults had to earn a living.

105

Wrong.

106

It's that adults take responsibility for themselves.

107

Making a living is only a small part of it.

108

Far more important is to take intellectual responsibility for oneself.

109

If I had to go through high school again, I'd treat it like a day job.

110

I don't mean that I'd slack in school.

111

Working at something as a day job doesn't mean doing it badly.

112

It means not being defined by it.

113

I mean I wouldn't think of myself as a high school student, just as a musician with a day job as a waiter doesn't think of himself as a waiter. [3] And when I wasn't working at my day job I'd start trying to do real work.

114

When I ask people what they regret most about high school, they nearly all say the same thing: that they wasted so much time.

115

If you're wondering what you're doing now that you'll regret most later, that's probably it. [4]

116

Some people say this is inevitable — that high school students aren't capable of getting anything done yet.

117

But I don't think this is true.

118

And the proof is that you're bored.

119

You probably weren't bored when you were eight.

120

When you're eight it's called "playing" instead of "hanging out," but it's the same thing.

121

And when I was eight, I was rarely bored.

122

Give me a back yard and a few other kids and I could play all day.

123

The reason this got stale in middle school and high school, I now realize, is that I was ready for something else.

124

Childhood was getting old.

125

I'm not saying you shouldn't hang out with your friends — that you should all become humorless little robots who do nothing but work.

126

Hanging out with friends is like chocolate cake.

127

You enjoy it more if you eat it occasionally than if you eat nothing but chocolate cake for every meal.

128

No matter how much you like chocolate cake, you'll be pretty queasy after the third meal of it.

129

And that's what the malaise one feels in high school is: mental queasiness. [5]

130

You may be thinking, we have to do more than get good grades.

131

We have to have extracurricular activities. But you know perfectly well how bogus most of these are.

132

Collecting donations for a charity is an admirable thing to do, but it's not hard. It's not getting something done.

133

What I mean by getting something done is learning how to write well, or how to program computers, or what life was really like in preindustrial societies, or how to draw the human face from life.

134

This sort of thing rarely translates into a line item on a college application.

97–103

In practice "stay upwind" reduces to "work on hard problems," and you can start today. Most people like to be good at what they do, but high school students rarely benefit, because they're given a fake thing to do. I let my need to be good be satisfied by merely doing well in school.

104–108

I'd have said adults differ from kids because they earn a living. Wrong. It's that adults take responsibility for themselves — and most important is to take intellectual responsibility for oneself.

109–113

I'd treat high school like a day job — not slacking, just not being defined by it, the way a musician waiting tables doesn't think of himself as a waiter. Off the clock, I'd start trying to do real work.

114–115

When I ask people what they regret most about high school, they nearly all say the same thing: that they wasted so much time. If you're wondering what you'll regret most later, that's probably it.

116–124

Some say this is inevitable, that high school students can't get anything done. But the proof you can is that you're bored. You weren't bored at eight, when "playing" was the same as "hanging out." It got stale because childhood was getting old.

125–129

I'm not saying become a humorless robot. Hanging out with friends is like chocolate cake: better occasionally than as every meal. That's the malaise of high school — mental queasiness.

130–134

You may think we need extracurriculars too. But you know how bogus most are. Collecting donations is admirable but not hard. Getting something done means learning to write well, or program, or draw the human face from life — which rarely becomes a line item on a college application.

96–134

"Stay upwind" reduces to "work on hard problems," and you can start today. High school feels like malaise because you're given a fake thing to do; the cure is to treat school as a day job and do real work on the side.

136

Corruption

137

It's dangerous to design your life around getting into college, because the people you have to impress to get into college are not a very discerning audience.

138

At most colleges, it's not the professors who decide whether you get in, but admissions officers, and they are nowhere near as smart.

139

They're the NCOs of the intellectual world.

140

They can't tell how smart you are.

141

The mere existence of prep schools is proof of that.

142

Few parents would pay so much for their kids to go to a school that didn't improve their admissions prospects.

143

Prep schools openly say this is one of their aims. But what that means, if you stop to think about it, is that they can hack the admissions process: that they can take the very same kid and make him seem a more appealing candidate than he would if he went to the local public school. [6]

144

Right now most of you feel your job in life is to be a promising college applicant.

145

But that means you're designing your life to satisfy a process so mindless that there's a whole industry devoted to subverting it.

146

No wonder you become cynical.

147

The malaise you feel is the same that a producer of reality TV shows or a tobacco industry executive feels.

148

And you don't even get paid a lot.

149

So what do you do?

150

What you should not do is rebel.

151

That's what I did, and it was a mistake.

152

I didn't realize exactly what was happening to us, but I smelled a major rat.

153

And so I just gave up.

154

Obviously the world sucked, so why bother?

155

When I discovered that one of our teachers was herself using Cliff's Notes, it seemed par for the course.

156

Surely it meant nothing to get a good grade in such a class.

157

In retrospect this was stupid.

158

It was like someone getting fouled in a soccer game and saying, hey, you fouled me, that's against the rules, and walking off the field in indignation.

159

Fouls happen.

160

The thing to do when you get fouled is not to lose your cool.

161

Just keep playing.

162

By putting you in this situation, society has fouled you.

163

Yes, as you suspect, a lot of the stuff you learn in your classes is crap.

164

And yes, as you suspect, the college admissions process is largely a charade.

165

But like many fouls, this one was unintentional. [7] So just keep playing.

166

Rebellion is almost as stupid as obedience.

167

In either case you let yourself be defined by what they tell you to do.

168

The best plan, I think, is to step onto an orthogonal vector.

169

Don't just do what they tell you, and don't just refuse to.

170

Instead treat school as a day job.

171

As day jobs go, it's pretty sweet.

172

You're done at 3 o'clock, and you can even work on your own stuff while you're there.

137–143

It's dangerous to design your life around getting into college, because the people you impress aren't discerning. Not professors decide, but admissions officers — the NCOs of the intellectual world, who can't tell how smart you are. The proof is prep schools, which can hack the process, making the very same kid a more appealing candidate.

144–148

You feel your job is to be a promising applicant. But that means satisfying a process so mindless there's a whole industry devoted to subverting it. No wonder you become cynical: the malaise is the same a reality-TV producer or tobacco executive feels — and you don't even get paid a lot.

149–165

So what do you do? What you should not do is rebel. That's what I did, and it was a mistake — like getting fouled in soccer and walking off the field in indignation. Society has fouled you: a lot of what you learn is crap, and admissions is largely a charade. But like many fouls, this one was unintentional. So just keep playing.

166–172

Rebellion is almost as stupid as obedience: either way you let yourself be defined by what they tell you. The best plan is to step onto an orthogonal vector — don't just obey, and don't just refuse. Treat school as a day job. As day jobs go it's sweet: done at 3, and you can even work on your own stuff there.

136–172

Designing your life to impress admissions officers means satisfying a process so mindless there's an industry devoted to subverting it. The answer is neither obedience nor rebellion, but to step onto an orthogonal vector and treat school as a day job.

174

Curiosity

175

And what's your real job supposed to be?

176

Unless you're Mozart, your first task is to figure that out.

177

What are the great things to work on?

178

Where are the imaginative people?

179

And most importantly, what are you interested in?

180

The word "aptitude" is misleading, because it implies something innate.

181

The most powerful sort of aptitude is a consuming interest in some question, and such interests are often acquired tastes.

182

A distorted version of this idea has filtered into popular culture under the name "passion." I recently saw an ad for waiters saying they wanted people with a "passion for service."

183

The real thing is not something one could have for waiting on tables.

184

And passion is a bad word for it.

185

A better name would be curiosity.

186

Kids are curious, but the curiosity I mean has a different shape from kid curiosity.

187

Kid curiosity is broad and shallow; they ask why at random about everything.

188

In most adults this curiosity dries up entirely.

189

It has to: you can't get anything done if you're always asking why about everything.

190

But in ambitious adults, instead of drying up, curiosity becomes narrow and deep.

191

The mud flat morphs into a well.

192

Curiosity turns work into play.

193

For Einstein, relativity wasn't a book full of hard stuff he had to learn for an exam.

194

It was a mystery he was trying to solve.

195

So it probably felt like less work to him to invent it than it would seem to someone now to learn it in a class.

196

One of the most dangerous illusions you get from school is the idea that doing great things requires a lot of discipline.

197

Most subjects are taught in such a boring way that it's only by discipline that you can flog yourself through them.

198

So I was surprised when, early in college, I read a quote by Wittgenstein saying that he had no self-discipline and had never been able to deny himself anything, not even a cup of coffee.

199

Now I know a number of people who do great work, and it's the same with all of them.

200

They have little discipline.

201

They're all terrible procrastinators and find it almost impossible to make themselves do anything they're not interested in.

202

One still hasn't sent out his half of the thank-you notes from his wedding, four years ago.

203

Another has 26,000 emails in her inbox.

204

I'm not saying you can get away with zero self-discipline.

205

You probably need about the amount you need to go running.

206

I'm often reluctant to go running, but once I do, I enjoy it.

207

And if I don't run for several days, I feel ill.

208

It's the same with people who do great things.

209

They know they'll feel bad if they don't work, and they have enough discipline to get themselves to their desks to start working.

210

But once they get started, interest takes over, and discipline is no longer necessary.

211

Do you think Shakespeare was gritting his teeth and diligently trying to write Great Literature?

212

Of course not.

213

He was having fun.

214

That's why he's so good.

215

If you want to do good work, what you need is a great curiosity about a promising question.

216

The critical moment for Einstein was when he looked at Maxwell's equations and said, what the hell is going on here?

217

It can take years to zero in on a productive question, because it can take years to figure out what a subject is really about.

218

To take an extreme example, consider math.

219

Most people think they hate math, but the boring stuff you do in school under the name "mathematics" is not at all like what mathematicians do.

220

The great mathematician G. H. Hardy said he didn't like math in high school either.

221

He only took it up because he was better at it than the other students.

222

Only later did he realize math was interesting — only later did he start to ask questions instead of merely answering them correctly.

223

When a friend of mine used to grumble because he had to write a paper for school, his mother would tell him: find a way to make it interesting.

224

That's what you need to do: find a question that makes the world interesting.

225

People who do great things look at the same world everyone else does, but notice some odd detail that's compellingly mysterious.

226

And not only in intellectual matters.

227

Henry Ford's great question was, why do cars have to be a luxury item?

228

What would happen if you treated them as a commodity?

229

Franz Beckenbauer's was, in effect, why does everyone have to stay in his position?

230

Why can't defenders score goals too?

175–181

And what's your real job? Unless you're Mozart, figuring that out is your first task. What are you interested in? "Aptitude" misleads, because it implies something innate. The most powerful aptitude is a consuming interest in some question — and such interests are often acquired tastes.

182–185

A distorted version filtered into popular culture as "passion." I saw an ad seeking waiters with a "passion for service." But the real thing isn't something you could have for waiting tables. A better name is curiosity.

186–191

Kid curiosity is broad and shallow — they ask why about everything. In most adults it dries up; it has to, or you'd get nothing done. But in ambitious adults it becomes narrow and deep. The mud flat morphs into a well.

192–195

Curiosity turns work into play. For Einstein, relativity wasn't hard stuff to learn for an exam; it was a mystery he was trying to solve. So it probably felt like less work to invent than it would to learn now in a class.

196–203

A dangerous illusion from school is that doing great things requires discipline. But Wittgenstein said he had no self-discipline, and everyone I know who does great work is the same: terrible procrastinators. One still hasn't sent his wedding thank-you notes, four years on; another has 26,000 emails in her inbox.

204–210

You still need a little discipline — about the amount you need to go running: just enough to get to your desk. Once you start, interest takes over and discipline is no longer necessary.

211–216

Do you think Shakespeare was gritting his teeth trying to write Great Literature? Of course not. He was having fun. That's why he's so good. The critical moment for Einstein was looking at Maxwell's equations and saying, what the hell is going on here?

217–222

It can take years to zero in on a productive question, because it takes years to learn what a subject is really about. Consider math: most think they hate it, but the boring school version is not what mathematicians do. Hardy didn't like it in high school either — only later did he ask questions instead of merely answering them.

223–230

A friend grumbling about a school paper was told by his mother: find a way to make it interesting. That's what you need — a question that makes the world interesting. People who do great things notice some odd, compellingly mysterious detail, and not only intellectual: Ford asked why cars had to be a luxury; Beckenbauer, why defenders couldn't score.

174–230

Your real job is to figure out what you're interested in — not "passion" but curiosity, the narrow, deep kind that turns work into play. Great work comes from a consuming question, not discipline; it takes years to find the question worth asking.

232

Now

233

If it takes years to articulate great questions, what do you do now, at sixteen?

234

Work toward finding one.

235

Great questions don't appear suddenly.

236

They gradually congeal in your head.

237

And what makes them congeal is experience.

238

So the way to find great questions is not to search for them — not to wander about thinking, what great discovery shall I make?

239

You can't answer that; if you could, you'd have made it.

240

The way to get a big idea to appear in your head is not to hunt for big ideas, but to put in a lot of time on work that interests you, and in the process keep your mind open enough that a big idea can take roost. Einstein, Ford, and Beckenbauer all used this recipe.

241

They all knew their work like a piano player knows the keys.

242

So when something seemed amiss to them, they had the confidence to notice it.

243

Put in time how and on what?

244

Just pick a project that seems interesting: to master some chunk of material, or to make something, or to answer some question.

245

Choose a project that will take less than a month, and make it something you have the means to finish.

246

Do something hard enough to stretch you, but only just, especially at first. If you're deciding between two projects, choose whichever seems most fun.

247

If one blows up in your face, start another.

248

Repeat till, like an internal combustion engine, the process becomes self-sustaining, and each project generates the next one. (This could take years.)

249

It may be just as well not to do a project "for school," if that will restrict you or make it seem like work.

250

Involve your friends if you want, but not too many, and only if they're not flakes.

251

Friends offer moral support (few startups are started by one person), but secrecy also has its advantages.

252

There's something pleasing about a secret project.

253

And you can take more risks, because no one will know if you fail.

254

Don't worry if a project doesn't seem to be on the path to some goal you're supposed to have.

255

Paths can bend a lot more than you think.

256

So let the path grow out the project.

257

The most important thing is to be excited about it, because it's by doing that you learn.

258

Don't disregard unseemly motivations.

259

One of the most powerful is the desire to be better than other people at something.

260

Hardy said that's what got him started, and I think the only unusual thing about him is that he admitted it.

261

Another powerful motivator is the desire to do, or know, things you're not supposed to.

262

Closely related is the desire to do something audacious.

263

Sixteen year olds aren't supposed to write novels.

264

So if you try, anything you achieve is on the plus side of the ledger; if you fail utterly, you're doing no worse than expectations. [8]

265

Beware of bad models.

266

Especially when they excuse laziness.

267

When I was in high school I used to write "existentialist" short stories like ones I'd seen by famous writers.

268

My stories didn't have a lot of plot, but they were very deep.

269

And they were less work to write than entertaining ones would have been.

270

I should have known that was a danger sign.

271

And in fact I found my stories pretty boring; what excited me was the idea of writing serious, intellectual stuff like the famous writers.

272

Now I have enough experience to realize that those famous writers actually sucked.

273

Plenty of famous people do; in the short term, the quality of one's work is only a small component of fame.

274

I should have been less worried about doing something that seemed cool, and just done something I liked.

275

That's the actual road to coolness anyway.

276

A key ingredient in many projects, almost a project on its own, is to find good books.

277

Most books are bad.

278

Nearly all textbooks are bad. [9] So don't assume a subject is to be learned from whatever book on it happens to be closest. You have to search actively for the tiny number of good books.

279

The important thing is to get out there and do stuff.

280

Instead of waiting to be taught, go out and learn.

281

Your life doesn't have to be shaped by admissions officers.

282

It could be shaped by your own curiosity.

283

It is for all ambitious adults.

284

And you don't have to wait to start.

285

In fact, you don't have to wait to be an adult.

286

There's no switch inside you that magically flips when you turn a certain age or graduate from some institution.

287

You start being an adult when you decide to take responsibility for your life.

288

You can do that at any age. [10]

289

This may sound like bullshit.

290

I'm just a minor, you may think, I have no money, I have to live at home, I have to do what adults tell me all day long.

291

Well, most adults labor under restrictions just as cumbersome, and they manage to get things done.

292

If you think it's restrictive being a kid, imagine having kids.

293

The only real difference between adults and high school kids is that adults realize they need to get things done, and high school kids don't.

294

That realization hits most people around 23.

295

But I'm letting you in on the secret early.

296

So get to work.

297

Maybe you can be the first generation whose greatest regret from high school isn't how much time you wasted.

233–239

If great questions take years, what do you do at sixteen? Work toward finding one. They congeal gradually, and what makes them congeal is experience. So don't search — don't wander about asking what great discovery you'll make. You can't answer that; if you could, you'd have made it.

240–242

The way to get a big idea is not to hunt for one, but to put in time on work that interests you, keeping your mind open enough that an idea can take roost. Einstein, Ford, and Beckenbauer all knew their work like a piano player knows the keys, so they noticed when something seemed amiss.

243–248

So pick a project that seems interesting — to master some material, make something, answer some question. Choose one that takes less than a month and that you can finish, hard enough to stretch you but only just. Between two, choose whichever seems most fun. If one blows up, start another, till the process becomes self-sustaining.

249–257

It may be just as well not to do it "for school," if that makes it seem like work. Involve friends, but only if they're not flakes; secrecy has advantages too, since you can take more risks when no one will know if you fail. And don't worry if a project doesn't seem on the path to some goal — paths bend more than you think, so let the path grow out of the project. It's by doing that you learn.

258–264

Don't disregard unseemly motivations. One is the desire to be better than others; Hardy admitted that's what got him started. Another is to do something audacious: sixteen-year-olds aren't supposed to write novels, so if you try, anything you achieve is a bonus.

265–275

Beware of bad models, especially when they excuse laziness. In high school I wrote "existentialist" stories like famous writers' — no plot, very deep, and less work than entertaining ones. Now I realize those writers actually sucked. I should have worried less about seeming cool and just done what I liked. That's the actual road to coolness anyway.

276–280

A key ingredient in many projects is finding good books. Most books are bad; nearly all textbooks are. So search actively for the tiny number of good ones. Instead of waiting to be taught, go learn.

281–288

Your life doesn't have to be shaped by admissions officers; it could be shaped by your own curiosity, as it is for all ambitious adults. And you don't have to wait to be one: you start being an adult when you decide to take responsibility for your life, at any age.

289–297

This may sound like bullshit — I'm just a minor, you think. But most adults labor under restrictions just as cumbersome and still get things done. The only real difference is that adults realize they need to get things done, and high school kids don't. That hits most people around 23; I'm letting you in early. So get to work.

232–297

At sixteen you can't search for a great question directly — you find it by putting in time on work that interests you. Pick a small project you can finish, choose whichever is most fun, and start; you don't have to wait to be an adult.

299

Notes

300

[1] A doctor friend warns that even this can give an inaccurate picture. "Who knew how much time it would take up, how little autonomy one would have for endless years of training, and how unbelievably annoying it is to carry a beeper?"

301

[2] His best bet would probably be to become dictator and intimidate the NBA into letting him play. So far the closest anyone has come is Secretary of Labor.

302

[3] A day job is one you take to pay the bills so you can do what you really want, like play in a band, or invent relativity.

303

Treating high school as a day job might actually make it easier for some students to get good grades.

304

If you treat your classes as a game, you won't be demoralized if they seem pointless.

305

However bad your classes, you need to get good grades in them to get into a decent college.

306

And that is worth doing, because universities are where a lot of the clumps of smart people are these days.

307

[4] The second biggest regret was caring so much about unimportant things. And especially about what other people thought of them.

308

I think what they really mean, in the latter case, is caring what random people thought of them.

309

Adults care just as much what other people think, but they get to be more selective about the other people.

310

I have about thirty friends whose opinions I care about, and the opinion of the rest of the world barely affects me.

311

The problem in high school is that your peers are chosen for you by accidents of age and geography, rather than by you based on respect for their judgement.

312

[5] The key to wasting time is distraction. Without distractions it's too obvious to your brain that you're not doing anything with it, and you start to feel uncomfortable. If you want to measure how dependent you've become on distractions, try this experiment: set aside a chunk of time on a weekend and sit alone and think. You can have a notebook to write your thoughts down in, but nothing else: no friends, TV, music, phone, IM, email, Web, games, books, newspapers, or magazines. Within an hour most people will feel a strong craving for distraction.

313

[6] I don't mean to imply that the only function of prep schools is to trick admissions officers. They also generally provide a better education. But try this thought experiment: suppose prep schools supplied the same superior education but had a tiny (.001) negative effect on college admissions. How many parents would still send their kids to them?

314

It might also be argued that kids who went to prep schools, because they've learned more, are better college candidates.

315

But this seems empirically false.

316

What you learn in even the best high school is rounding error compared to what you learn in college.

317

Public school kids arrive at college with a slight disadvantage, but they start to pull ahead in the sophomore year.

318

(I'm not saying public school kids are smarter than preppies, just that they are within any given college.

319

That follows necessarily if you agree prep schools improve kids' admissions prospects.)

320

[7] Why does society foul you? Indifference, mainly. There are simply no outside forces pushing high school to be good. The air traffic control system works because planes would crash otherwise. Businesses have to deliver because otherwise competitors would take their customers. But no planes crash if your school sucks, and it has no competitors. High school isn't evil; it's random; but random is pretty bad.

321

[8] And then of course there is money. It's not a big factor in high school, because you can't do much that anyone wants. But a lot of great things were created mainly to make money. Samuel Johnson said "no man but a blockhead ever wrote except for money." (Many hope he was exaggerating.)

322

[9] Even college textbooks are bad. When you get to college, you'll find that (with a few stellar exceptions) the textbooks are not written by the leading scholars in the field they describe. Writing college textbooks is unpleasant work, done mostly by people who need the money. It's unpleasant because the publishers exert so much control, and there are few things worse than close supervision by someone who doesn't understand what you're doing. This phenomenon is apparently even worse in the production of high school textbooks.

323

[10] Your teachers are always telling you to behave like adults. I wonder if they'd like it if you did. You may be loud and disorganized, but you're very docile compared to adults. If you actually started acting like adults, it would be just as if a bunch of adults had been transposed into your bodies. Imagine the reaction of an FBI agent or taxi driver or reporter to being told they had to ask permission to go the bathroom, and only one person could go at a time. To say nothing of the things you're taught. If a bunch of actual adults suddenly found themselves trapped in high school, the first thing they'd do is form a union and renegotiate all the rules with the administration.

300–301

A doctor friend warns that even volunteering misleads: little autonomy through endless training, and the annoyance of a beeper. As for the four-foot NBA hopeful, his best bet is to become dictator — so far the closest anyone's come is Secretary of Labor.

302–306

A day job pays the bills so you can do what you really want, like play in a band or invent relativity. Treating high school as one might even make grades easier. And you do need good grades, because universities are where a lot of the clumps of smart people are these days.

307–311

The second biggest regret was caring so much about what random people thought. Adults care just as much, but get to be selective. In high school your peers are chosen for you by age and geography, not by respect for their judgement.

312

The key to wasting time is distraction. To measure your dependence, set aside time on a weekend and sit alone and think — notebook allowed, but no friends, screens, music, or books. Within an hour most people crave distraction.

313–319

Prep schools also provide a better education — but suppose it came with a tiny negative effect on admissions: how many parents would still send their kids? What you learn in even the best high school is rounding error compared to college.

320–321

Why does society foul you? Indifference, mainly. No planes crash if your school sucks, and it has no competitors. High school isn't evil; it's random — but random is pretty bad. As Johnson said, "no man but a blockhead ever wrote except for money."

322–323

Even college textbooks are bad, written not by leading scholars but by people who need the money; it's even worse for high school. And teachers tell you to behave like adults, but wouldn't like it if you did: trapped in high school, the first thing real adults would do is form a union and renegotiate the rules.

299–323

Footnotes: how each clump of smart people and each ugly truth about school works in practice — from beepers to prep-school admissions to why society fouls you out of mere indifference.

325

Thanks to Ingrid Bassett, Trevor Blackwell, Rich Draves, Dan Giffin, Sarah Harlin, Jessica Livingston, Jackie McDonough, Robert Morris, Mark Nitzberg, Lisa Randall, and Aaron Swartz for reading drafts of this, and to many others for talking to me about high school.

326

Why Nerds are Unpopular [blocked]

325–326

Thanks to the many friends who read drafts of this and talked with me about high school.

325–326

Thanks to the friends who read drafts and talked with him about high school.